Who am I?
What's this all about?
The obligatory introduction...
Allow me to introduce myself; my name is Nikki, a wife to Frank and a stay-at-home mom to three children: Uli, 14; Alex, 4; and Ali, 2 years old. I know, cliche! I try to avoid introducing myself this way. It makes me feel weird because, frankly, it is not who I am. But it is what I do or what is expected of me--all day. And maybe you too, whoever you are reading this--so, perhaps it is inevitable.
But let me tell you a teeny bit more about me. Who knows? Maybe we’ll find something in common.
I became a mother at the tender age of 19. I was in college and pregnant just four months after dating Frank. I know, so cray! After all these years, there are days I still feel like a teen mom. Having kids is easy. The challenge is raising your children to be the decent human beings you would actually want to hang out with someday.
I face each morning with a hopeful heart, then usually end by patting myself on the back for surviving another day of chaos, gut-wrenching mom-guilt and successfully ticking items off my to-do list.
I am a woman with a million and one thoughts circulating about every important and unimportant aspect of my life. And, I am also a mom who is winging-it-- my eyeliner, my life, everything… everyday!
I am oftentimes a walking contradiction;
I am laxed, but then I worry.
I am a loner, but never lonely.
I am an introvert. I am an extrovert.
I have dreams, but I am lazy.
I regret, rethink and doubt all my decisions.
I am impulsive.
I am shy.
I am a worry worm, a neat freak, a scatterbrain.
I used to be organised. I used to have my shit together and I used to be able to follow a schedule (then I had kids…).
I am a frustrated artist and writer.
This blog serves as my journal; a place for me to be vulnerable, to release the mentally consuming gibberish aggravating an angry mom. I do not want to be her. I yearn to relish my children while they are young and perhaps I can continue to brainwash them into thinking I am the most amazing person to ever live. I want to be a better person and savor each day, rather than consuming myself with mundane thoughts.
This is the beginning of my journey to being present and letting go--letting things just be. In return, hoping for a lighter heart and a clearer mind.
This is an open book of experiences, thoughts, insights, and solutions for women and mothers. Here, I will bear my confessions. I will share my passion for DIY’s, shopping, fashion, bento how-to's, and life. Some (mom) hacks I discover or even “copy” from friends and influencers will be thrown in here too.
Through this process, I wish to connect with other like-minded women to reassure them that they are not going crazy--we are normal. Wait, this is normal? I think… Regardless, you are not alone.
As the saying goes, “Every gal has the same number of hours in a day as Beyonce…” but I’m betting that even the Queen B. certainly has her off days!